Cherry Ice Cream

I think we have a poltergeist.  And they don’t like glass containers.

About two weeks ago, I took a container of homemade sauce out of the freezer to defrost for dinner and as I attempted to open it, the bottom fell off like someone had taken a machete and just hacked it off.  Pasta with glass shards anyone? No?  Okay, on to plan B for dinner then.

Of course, everyone immediately became a consumer reports Dateline Exclusive investigator.”Where did you buy that container?” “Was it made to be able to withstand freezing temperatures?” “What is the OSHA rating on that?” “Did you compromise the integrity of the glass by microwaving it or heating it on the stove?” (Picture me here doing some Oscar-worthy eye rolling and mentally counting to 1000 before I grabbed the nearest sharp instrument and threatened bodily harm).

The inquisition aside, we chalked it all up to a one off and went on with life.

And then last week, our friend struck again…

This time, it was two different days where we opened the dishwasher to find that a drinking glass had broken into enormous shards….for no reason.  They were put in the same way they always are, no-one went all Rambo crazy in closing the door or sliding the shelf back in, but there it was…huge jagged shards of glass on the top rack, bottom rack, bottom of the washer, and in one case, missing altogether.

No idea what happened to the missing shard since the washer had not even been run.  We got out our gloves, flashlights, tweezers, magnifying glasses, fingerprint kit…we NCISed the heck out of that washer and glass.  We roped off the crime scene, questioned all the usual suspects, including the dog, her boyfriend, the mail carrier, UPS deliver person, Amazon driver, neighbors and even some random Uber driver who may have driven by and seem something.  Nothing.  Whoever shattered that glass took the shard with them…but the question is: Why?  We may never know.

But the final (I hope) incident occurred the other night as we all sat down to dinner.  We had some friends over and I had made salads.  I didn’t want to use our everyday bowls since they were a bit large, so I decided to use some glass bowls that I had lurking around at the back of the cupboard and hadn’t seen the light of day for a bazillion years.  We gave them a quick wash, then sat down to eat.  About halfway through dinner, one of the bowls exploded in a shower of glass, lettuce and assorted veggies.  The carnage was everywhere!

No one had touched it, bumped it, looked at it, breathed on it, taken a picture of it, or even given it a thought in the last few minutes (the person whose salad it was was too busy concentrating on all the other yummy things to be overly enthusiastic about a mere salad).  It simply combusted all by itself….or did it have some help from beyond the grave?  I may have call Scooby and Shaggy in to help solve this one.

Ingredients for coconut version:

• 3 cups pitted cherries
• 1 cup Greek yogurt
• 1 (15 oz) can coconut cream (NOT coconut milk)
• 2 teaspoons vanilla extract
• 1 Tablespoon coconut oil (optional)
• 1/3 cup agave
• pinch of salt

Directions:

1. Combine all ingredients in a blender and pulse to break up the cherries and combine all the ingredients.  Do not puree, rather leave the cherries in small bits.
2. Pour the ice cream into popsicle molds and follow manufacturer’s directions for freezing (mine too about 4 hours).
3. If you do not have ice cream molds, you can pour the batter into a pan or dish and place it, covered, into the freezer for 5-6 hours or overnight, briskly whisking or using beaters every hour for the first 3-4 hours to incorporate air and help make it creamy.  Allow the container to sit out for 20-30 minutes to soften it up in order to scoop it.
4. Enjoy the popsicles directly out of the freezer…no waiting!

Ingredients for regular version:

• 2 cups pitted cherries
• 1/2 cup unsweetened vanilla Greek yogurt
• 1/2 cup coconut cream (scoop from the top of a can of coconut milk or buy the mini size –cream only, no water)
• 1 Tablespoon coconut oil (I use refined so there is no coconut flavor — this is optional)
• up to 1/4 cup agave (or sweetener of choice) depending on how sweet the cherries are

Directions:

1. Put all ingredients in a blender and process till smooth.
2. Pour the ice cream into molds and follow manufacturer’s directions for freezing.

Enjoy!