Fried Green Tomatoes
My parents grew up during the depression, so they know the value of things and basically cannot bear to throw anything out. This can be a good thing or a bad thing.
Recently, my sister and I realized that their storage closet had become more like a landfill (I’m pretty sure we saw Jimmy Hoffa’s shoe poking out from beneath a stack of boxes way in the back), so we decided to do something about it. In our minds, we were helping organize them and making the room usable again, in my father’s mind, we were throwing out perfectly good items that he treasured and ruining his life in the process.
Case in point: 3 fairly good-sized boxes.
When they moved to their current apartment almost four years ago, they apparently cleaned out the medicine cabinets/bathroom drawers and put the items in these three boxes. And then promptly forgot about them. Fun fact, rubbing alcohol that is roughly ten years past its expiration date will swell up the bottle to three times its size, and change color in the process. My father argued that it was still perfectly good, my sister and I donned gloves and bullet-proof vests just to get it safely out of the apartment.
He believed that shaving cream which was only four years past the date of expiration was still safe to use, while we reminded him that he had in fact switched to an electric razor years ago and this stuff was as likely to burn a hole through his skin as it was to help him achieve a close shave.
Antacid that expired in 2019? Best case scenario, it wouldn’t cut down on the acid. More likely scenario? He would end up in the ER getting his stomach pumped.
Among the truly puzzling items we found were no less than 4 hair picks which had to have been leftover from all the horrific 80’s perms we foolishly believed made us look like Meg Ryan or Whitney Houston, when in reality we looked like the human equivalent of a standard poodle in need of grooming. There was also the hair brush with the hollow handle for hairspray that someone was suckered into buying, probably along with some swampland in Florida.
We had to patiently explain to my father who was hovering anxiously over us during the whole process that if we ever found ourselves in need of these items again, we should immediately have all sharp objects taken away from us and a mental health professional should be consulted.
We got rid of a mini-food processor that had a cracked lid and therefore processed the food all over the kitchen walls (a model they haven’t made since the 90’s), a sound bar and iPod that worked with the original wide plugs on Apple devices and was downloaded with selections from Perry Como and Henry Mancini, and three or four leg braces that had dry rotted into a pile of rags.
Needless to say, my sister and I have been banned from their place until my father perfects the protective spells he is working on, or gets a really big safe installed. Whichever comes first.
Ingredients:
- 2 large green tomatoes
- 1 head of garlic
- 1 medium onion
- 1/2 cup quinoa
- 1/4 teaspoon salt
- 1/2 cup cornmeal
- 2 TBS dried parsley
- arrowroot powder (or potato starch)
Directions:
- Preheat the oven to 400
- Cut the top off of the garlic, drizzle with a bit of oil or vegetable broth, and wrap tightly in foil.
- Slice the onion in half then each half in thin slices. Place on a small pan, drizzle with a bit of oil or vegetable broth, sprinkle with a little salt and cover tightly with foil. Put both the garlic and onion in the oven and roast for 1/2 hour or until soft but not mushy. Remove from the oven and allow to cool.
- Rinse the quinoa under running water, scrubbing a bit with your fingers.
- Put the quinoa, garlic (squeeze the cloves out of the skin), onion and salt in a blender and process till smooth and creamy. You may need to add a bit of liquid like water if it is too thick, but add a teaspoon at a time as you want this to be a thick batter.
- Set out three dishes. Place arrowroot in one, the batter in the second one and the cornmeal and parsley (combined) in the third.
- Dip each slice of tomato in the arrowroot, shaking off the excess, then in the batter and finally in the cornmeal.
- In an air fryer or oven set at 400, spray the top of the tomatoes lightly with oil and fry for 6 minutes in the air fryer, then flip over, spray with a little oil and fry 3-4 minutes longer till golden. For the oven, spray with oil, bake 8-10 minutes, flip, spray and bake an additional 8-10 minutes till golden and crispy.
- Serve with the lemon yogurt sauce below and some micro greens.
Ingredients:
- 1/2 cup Greek yogurt
- juice of 1 lemon
- 1 TBS honey or more to taste
Directions:
- Combine all ingredients in a small bowl and whisk or stir to combine.
Enjoy!
