Orange and Cinnamon Poached Pear

Sometimes, I swear the house is haunted…and it’s gone way beyond Casper taking my keys, phone and measuring cups every single time I put them down on the counter.

Sadly, this is not our first time dealing with a not-so-friendly ghost.

Years ago, we had a car that, as you drove along, would lock and unlock the doors randomly. Driving through a dicey part of town? Unlock.  Getting gas? Lock.  With the keys inside.  In the middle of winter.

It would also randomly change radio stations.  One minute you’d be listening to Bon Jovi (yes, I do occasionally listen to something besides broadway show tunes), and the next you were tiptoeing through the tulips with Tiny Tim and his ukulele.  The worst of it was that no matter what button you pushed, no matter how hard you pushed it, no matter how loudly you cursed, you could not get the channel to change….or the radio to turn off.  Pretty much the only option was to put both hands firmly over your ears and chant, “lalalalalala I can’t hear you!” until the spirits of the netherworld released the car from their spell.

Before someone’s head spun around and they started spouting pea soup like a geyser, we sold the car and crossed our fingers that our poltergeist went with it.

And now…….he’s baaaaaaack!

We currently have three smoke detectors (and counting) that have decided to just randomly beep for no reason. Repeatedly.  In the middle of the night.  I have changed the batteries.  Twice.  I have  lit a black candle at dawn while holding a container of salt, chanted the words to I’ve Put A Spell On You frontwards and backwards  standing on one foot and waving my arms like a deranged chicken, and even resorted to googling “exorcists near you” at random hours of the day and night.  Nothing works.

Every time I put the detectors back up, they lull me into a false sense of accomplishment by remaining silent while I clambor down the ladder and haul it back to the garage.  Then, just as I am patting myself on the back for a job well done, the start their harassment all over again.  Beep.  Beep. Beeeeeeep.  AAAAARGH!

And now, we have two light switches that have decided to join in the mayhem by not working.  One is an outdoor light that simply refuses to turn on.  Oddly, pushing the button repeatedly does not seem to be helping.  Casper has clearly brought it over to the dark side.  So now, when we take the dog out to potty, we skulk around the yard with flashlights just waiting for the neighbors to call the police and have us hauled away.

But the worst by far is our overhead bedroom light which the spirits that be have decided shall remain on at all times. No amount of begging, threatening, cajoling or bribing can budge these ghosts.  I’m just waiting for the closet door to fly open and get dragged into the fourth dimension one night, able to communicate with Tim and Chloe only through the TV.

I wonder how fast we can sell the house?

Ingredients:

• 2 pears
• 1  1/2 cups orange juice
• 1/2 cup water
• 1 teaspoon of vanilla
• 3/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1/8 teaspoon ground cloves
• 1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg

Directions:

1. Peel the pears and cut them in half.  With a melon baller or teaspoon, remove the center of each half with the pits.  Be careful not to go too deep or too big.  You should be removing a piece about the size of a grape.
2. In a medium pot, combine the juice, water, vanilla, cinnamon, cloves and nutmeg.  Place the pears in the pot and bring the mixture to a boil.  Cover and simmer for twenty minutes or until pears are tender but not mushy.  Turn the pears over halfway through.
3. Store the pears in the juice in the refrigerator till ready to serve.  If you are serving all of the pears at once, you can put the juice mixture back on the stove in a small pot and boil it till reduced by half to make a syrup to pour over the pears.

Enjoy!